philanthropissed

(fəˈlanTHrəpist) adj. The mood of a creative professional constantly asked to provide professional services <i>pro bono</i>.

I just designed yet another print piece for free and now I'm philanthropissed.

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hung shui

The art of arranging one's penis and testicles in underwear so as to create the illusion of enhanced girth and/or length.

Example 1: "I worked some hung shui magic and now it looks like I'm packin' serious sausage."

Example 2: "Did Jimmy stuff a potato in his pants?" "No, he just did some hung shui."

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Lent Trap

/lɛnt træp/ noun

In couples where one party is Catholic and the other is not, the unwilling subjection of the non-Catholic to the 40-day ritual of penitence known as Lent.

1. We were going to have dinner at this great new steak place on Friday night, but Joe's got me stuck in a Lent Trap.

2. My wife Jane decided to give up sex for Lent. Worst. Lent Trap. Ever.

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wikileak

n., (WIH-kee-leek) a collaborative process whereby one takes a piss while allowing anonymous others unfettered access to and control of the flow of urine.

Frequently produces extremely unreliable results including wildly inaccurate aim, incomplete evacuation, and a general lack of familiarity with the source material.

Example 1:
Person A: "God damnit! You sprayed piss all over the bathroom again!"
Person B: "Honey, it was beautiful! I helped destroy the oppressive bathroom meritocracy by letting others pee for me, allowing the free market to relish its inexplicable sense of exceptionalism in spite of any individual lack of skill or intelligence.
Person A: What a load of horseshit.
Person B: No, dear, wikidump is entirely different and won't be available until a subsequent open-source beta.

Example 2:
Man: "No officer, I wasn't cruising the bathroom, I was taking a wikileak."
Police Man: "Sure thing, Senator Craig…"

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nerdonym

--noun Grammar (NURD-uh-nim)

1. Any word whose proper pronunciation is unknown because the word has only been read, primarily in books. Such words are often tragically mispronounced, and may lay dormant for years until the correct pronunciation is heard in conversation.

Frequent usage of nerdonyms indicates excessive reading, likely of science-fiction and/or fantasy books.

Common examples:

• My first recorded nerdonym is "gazebo", which I originally thought was "GAYS-bo".

• What do you mean it's pronounced "GRAIN-ing"? I thought it was "Matt GRO-en-ing"!

• Person A: "I'm having a 'DIAL-mama'."
Person B: "A what?"
A: "A 'DIAL-mama'."
B: "Do you mean 'dilemma'?"
A: I thought it was...
B: ...it's 'DILL-emma", dude. You just had a nerdonym.

• "He's a great OH-raider. What? I just discovered a nerdonym, didn't I?"