ponderpurchase

A purchase made after extended deliberation. The opposite of an impulse buy. Usually performed by a male.

Bill: New John Deere there Bob?
Bob: Yeah, just got it today. Have been push mowing this yard for 5 years, thinking about a way to afford the big green machine. Was looking like the ponderpurchase that wasn't going to happen but then old Uncle Frank finally kicked off and sent us a stipend.

dumbshit

Shitting without having your smartphone with you.

I took a dumbshit this morning. When I ran upstairs to piss, it ended up changing into the full monty. Caught without my iphone, the download process only took a minute or two instead of the 20 minutes normally required to text, tweet, and surf from the throne.

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