Turd of Shit

Something of such low quality, of such minisquel value, that it might in fact be the least significant item in the universe.

I bought a brand new Rolex Daytona online. I paid $5,000 for it. When I got it in the mail, I opened the box, and it turned out to be a turd of shit. I hate myself.

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Worry Wart

AKA Worrywart - Someone who is always worrying about everything, whether it is a big deal or unimportant.

A Worry Wart "I don't know guys, I don't think we should go to Burger King, I've heard bad things about that place."
Someone Else "Shut the fuck up and stop being such a worry wart.

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Funnies

The only part of a newspaper worth looking at. Located beside or near the crossword puzzles and cryptoquote. Famous funnies include Garfield, Family Circus, Andy Capp, and Peanuts.

Paper Boy - "Here's your paper, Susan."
Oliver (to Susan) - "Would you mind passing me the funnies once you're done?"

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220

Slang for the Canadian public intoxication fine. The fine is of $220, and can substitute for the fine. Can also be used if you are walking someone where intoxicated.

"Stop chasing those children Mike! You're gonna get a 220!"

"Our sober drive home just bailed on us. Wanna 220 it back to my place later?"

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Unthaw

To freeze. Often used as a synonym for thaw or defreeze, although this is hideously incorrect. It actually means the opposite, when taken literally. Don't argue it. You are wrong.

Pete "The pizza was frozen so I let it unthaw for half an hour."
Willy "Get the fuck out of here you hick. And for the record, it's 'thaw'."

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Bong Song

An a capella or with accompaniment of household guitars, drums, harmonicas, etc... which is created spontaneously during impairment of THC (works best if it really is a bong) being consumed. These songs often feature knee slapping, foot stomping, air guitar playing, sound effects, or any other form of simple music. During these songs most people imagine the thought through your mind that you will one day be famous for creating such strange and beautiful music, but never say anything out loud.

"Hey Adam," screams Jeff. "We just wrote a new 32 minute bong song!" Adam gestures his hand as a billboard sign. "We call it... erm...heu he he....... 'Bong Song'...heuheh.." explained Adam, slowly becoming confused.

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20/20 pimple

A pimple which can easily be noticed by a person with normal vision. Much unlike a blind pimple.

Person 1 "Did you see that zit that Jimmy had on his nose?"
Person 2 "Of course I did. Everyone could. It was a 20/20 pimple for sure."

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