un jiffy

A word used to denote a small amount of time. Most commonly less than 1 minute.

"Guys, I'll be back in un jiffy"

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Penis inversion

A forseeable event in which the nature is so severe that the victims penis feels it is about to invert at the moment the particular event occurs.

Guy 1: I've got a penis inversion coming up tonight, she said she was disappointed and needed to talk to me.

Guy 2: Shit, I'm gonna make sure im at least 300 feet away at the time of impact as I value the functions of my penis.

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IP

1. Internet Protocol

2. A person in which one finds complete happiness, comfort and wellbeing, abbreviated from Island Paradise. Usually one of the opposite sex.

I don't need to worry about that, I've found myself an IP now.

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Uleh

A Uleh is usually one from an ethnic background commonly found in groups around schools, shopping centres and other urbanised areas. Ulehs consider themselves to be at the highest of the social hierachy when in reality they are just fat, hairy and stupid. They have poor personal hygiene and usually have a face hairier than a Gorilla's ass by the time they are 7.

Localities:
Ulehs can be found almost anywhere in Australia especially the southern regions. Specifically, Ulehs can be spotted congregating around any large shopping centre with a bus stop (e.g. shoppo)

Appearance:
Ulehs usually wear gear from labels such as Tommy Hilfiger, Dada, Champion, Puma and Adidas. The majority of Ulehs will wear a beanie wherever they roam.

Age Range: 12-25

Uleh 1: OMG bro check out ma new nokia
Uleh 2: Holy shit bro thats sick
Uleh 3: OMG RE I just farted
Raplh Wiggum: The leprechaun told me to burn things

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Metcard

A small, reasonably priced disposable card used in Melbourne, it is used as a conveinient ticket for all methods of public transport.

" I seemed to have an endless supply of Metcards coming out of my pockets so I decided to UD it"

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Friendship whore

A friendship whore is a person of the female sex (can in some cases be male)who will attempt to gain friends by pretending that they are an honest, loving human being. Once you have been insnared by this particular person and you truly do trust and support them, they will stop caring all together. Although you should hate the particular person for doing so, the friendship whore has made sure that the friendship has reached beyond a point of return, therefore leaving you unable to turn around and hate the particular person. Thus leaving you depressed for a number of weeks, months or possibly years in some extreme cases of friendship whoreism.

Side Effects: Victims of friendship whoreism may experience;

*immediate cardiac arrest

*strange mental patterns

*repetition of the alphabet backwards written all over walls

*strange code languages created to avoid thinking about the friendship whore

*severe head trauma from banging the face on a sheet of steel, then repeating 350 times until the mind is numb.

NOTE: To avoid being victimised of a friendship whore I suggest ignoring anyone who seems at first to be too good to be true. This may be hard at first but it is worth the initial difficulty.

I managed to avoid becoming a Friendship Whore victim and life has never been better

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