Peoria

The city of Peoria, Illinois. Also known as P-town. Basically a real-world equivalent of Spoon River, as the bulk of the population consists of people with little money, a McJob, and no hope.

Peoria is also the home of Bradley University, a pretty good private school. However, BU is overpriced and full of jocks, preps, and emo kids.

"Why did he hang himself, officer?"
'Well, he lived in Peoria."

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creationism

The idea that two centuries of consistent scientific data by thousands of logical minds is wrong and that Earth and life were not created by a causal chain of events but by an infinitely knowing, loving and powerful--yet seemingly indecisive and possibly bipolar--deity in less than a week. Its strongest argument is its compelling assertion that if you don't believe in it, you'll go to Hell with everyone Jerry Falwell finds personally distasteful and you'll all roast for eternity while demons gangrape you with white-hot tridents.

Jack Chick said science is just as evil as Catholics and Jews, and that's why I believe in creationism.

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Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

1. The original science-fiction comedy. Written by the late Douglas Adams, HGttG incorporated poignant observations about the nature of Life, the Universe and Everything with ridiculous slapstick. It began as a radio show, but was later made into a book trilogy in five parts. The one steadfast rule of the series is that logic and causality are for sissies.

2. A fictional device similar to a PDA which contains an encyclopedic database about everything you could possibly want to know about, written by underpaid or unpaid people not really concerned with accuracy (much like UrbanDictionary). It comes in a box that has the words "DON'T PANIC!" in large, friendly letters.

"Thanks to the Hitchhiker's Guide, I've become an expert in all sorts of useless crap. And I can fly."

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