deja view

Turning on a TV show that you don't usually watch and yet somehow, inexplicably, always managing to see the same rerun episode.

Roommate 1: Unbelieveable! Whenever I settle on watching "Medium" I somehow always pick up the episode when Allison is battling the ghost serial killer played by the dad from "That 70's Show".

Roommate 2: Oh, I love that one!

Roommate1: Yeah, but this the 3rd time I've seen it and its the only episode I've ever seen! Didn't they make like five seasons of this show? Talk about your deja view!

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nook smart

A contraction of "nookie" and "book smart". Having the natural ability to read women perfectly in order to get laid.

a) Charlie is too damn nook smart for his own good. He'll never be someone's Mr. Right, but somehow always manages to be Mr. Right Now.

b) Just like how being book smart doesn't help on the streets, it's important to note that being nook smart isn't helpful in long term relatipnships.

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bacon strips

Condition identifiable by stretched, grizzled, dangling, and sometimes elongated flaps of skin that used to be the labia minor on an overworked porn star's (or college co-ed's) vagina.

Not to be misdiagnosed as vaganus.

Did you see the latest Jenna Jamison flick?
No, my doctor said I need to cut back on my daily consumption of bacon strips.

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born with a plastic spoon in my mouth

The be born poor; the opposite of being born with a silver spoon in your mouth.

I'm not poor and dumb enough to be a NASCAR driver, Kenny! I wasn't born with a plastic spoon in my mouth like you!

-- Eric Cartman

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Ass Bush

1) When a particularly hairy man has pubic hair growing in a large patch above his ass crack.

2) How the entire world will remember the 43rd president of the United States.

1) Borat and Ron Jeremy are so hairy they sport ass bushes on camera.

2) In the year 2125:
Teacher -- Class, which president is responible for turning the USA into a 3rd world nation?
Student -- The younger George Bush?
Teacher: What's is proper name as it appears in your text book?
Student: Oh yeah. Ass Bush!

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tangle

The act of OR pertaining to sexual relations.

Last night I hooked up with two chicks and got into a tangle ... y'know what I'm sayin"?

Hey, baby. Wanna tangle?

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three finger proctological exam

Anything or anyone that's a HUGE pain in the ass.

To suck and blow simultaneously.

This weekend my boss is making redo this month's TPS report. What a huge three finger protological exam that's going to be!

Having Jerry around is like having a constant three finger proctological exam!

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