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When your underwear is so old, it doesn't need to be thrown away, it just transmogrifies into underwear vapor and floats away.
"Billy's not wearing underwear". "Oh, he was, but it transmogrified into underwear vapor anjd now it's gone.
When your gut and intestines are rumbling and roaring, and watery sausage poop jettison's out your blow hole with firehose force..
Man, that Thai food last night gave me an extreme case of Borgarigmus of the blowhole!