Alden Glaz

The famous arch nemesis of Jared Beam private I (The I stands for investigator).

Commonly identified by his incredibly large hooked nose and New Jersey accent. Is a very bad guy and will rob you of your valuables. Possibly Jewish? Carries a duckfoot menorah gun. Also carries an umbrella, even when it does not rain. He also may own a pharmacy.

He has fought the famous Jared Beam Private I on many occasions, but has mostly lost.

Notable quotes from Alden Glaz:

Jarred Beam! (In New Jersey voice)
I'll get you next time Beam!
You ruined my evil plans!
Have you ever tried hummus?
Oh boy!
OH NO JARRED BEAM!