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Gooch Strip

the Gooch strip is an area on a man's gooch which is totally deviod of any pubic hair as a result of having is waxed or shaved. the Gooch strip has been pioneered for several reasons.

a) To provide higher pleasure for a gooch stroker

b) To make it possible for a friend to gooch snort

c) general heatlh and hygiene of the Gooch itself

d) to reduce some of the adverse affects of Gooch Throb

eric ppaced the waxing strip onto his gooch with deft precision, a bead of sweat rolled down his face as he considered the possible ramifications of misplacing the wax strip... he shuddered as he thought of tearing his bacon strip right off. Eric inhaled deeply, and started counting down from then, when he got to four he surprised himself and tore the wax strip off "BWAAAAAAAAAAHRGHMNFT" he shrieked as the wax strip tore away each and every hair on his gooch. Eric smiled to himself as he gazed upon the beauty of his now perfectly formed gooch strip and chuckled out loud the words his Great-Great Grandfater passed to him "perfection has its price."

by The padre October 22, 2009

11πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Valducci

Pronounced Val doo chee, Valducci is an exceptionally versatile word which can be used as both perjorative term for a man who behaves like a prick.

And if it is shotened to 'valduc' (val dooch) it becomes a term of endearment one might use among friends.

First usage - Steve: "Hey Coach, look Whitewolf just logged on, that guy is such a Valducci, he never shares medpacks, what a little gooch stroker."

Second usage: Coach Z: "Hey Whitewolf haven't seen you in ages, whats been happening Valduc?"

by The padre September 14, 2010

4πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


Gooch Throb

Gooch Throb is a condition that results from extreme excitement whereby the male's gooch becomes swollen and red, and a slight throbbing can be felt internally in the region of the gooch.

Gooch throb is not sexual excitement which would result in an erection (see boner or hard on) it is only possible to have Gooch throb in a non-sexual situation.

Z Dawg: Hey dude I am sooooo excited about game-a-palooza II tomorrow that my freakin' Gooch is throbbing

Captain Spanky: Whoa Dude, you need to calm down, it sounds like you've got a bad case of Gooch Throb!

by The padre October 22, 2009

20πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Gooch Assasin

A 'Gooch Assasin' is a man who takes pleasure in hand slapping the gooch of another man. A gooch assasin may or may not have acutal ninja skills. There are a particularly disturbing comunity of Gooch assasins who attack their prey when showering.

A perjorative term used to describe someone of the same gender who has invaded your personal space.

Walter the Gooch Assasin waited quietly in the wardrobe for Stuart to enter the hotel room and undress. As soon as Stuart was naked Walter cartwheeled across the room and slapped him right on his exposed gooch.

While Xavier was waiting in line Timothy pressed closer than Xavier felt comfortable with. To alert Timothy Xavier said "geez Timothy could you take a step back, you don't have to stand so close you gooch assasin!' Timothy got the point and backed it up.

by The padre October 17, 2009

73πŸ‘ 10πŸ‘Ž


Duck Soup

Duck Soup is a gathering of sad and single people on a Sunday night making one last ditch effort to 'get lucky' at the weekend. Duck Soup is often frequented by lonely cougars, and fag hags but never a hottie (unless they are there to make sport of all the losers).

This phrase was coined after the 1933 movie of the same title, directed by Leo McCarey, written by Bert Kalmar and Harry Ruby and starring the Marx brothers.

A gathering of Duck Soup is aptly named, because Groucho Marx described Duck Soup... '"Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together.'

In other words, all the left over or inferior crap thrown in together, but nothing exotic or tasty. thus we are in human terms left with overweight, balding, sweaty men and women, none of whom are attractive, all trying to score each other.

Jeffy; Damn Jo, look at all of these sad lonely people here at the house of Ales, whats going on?

Jo: Its Sunday night Jeffy, they are Duck Soup!

by The padre October 20, 2009

33πŸ‘ 43πŸ‘Ž


cock swaddler

A perjorative term used to describe a man who touches himself far more than he ought.

Mother:For crying out loud, Jacob is playing with himself again.

Father: that boys needs to take his hand off it, he's turning into a real cock swaddler!

by The padre October 18, 2009

19πŸ‘ 6πŸ‘Ž


gooch stroker

a gooch stroker is a person who takes pleasure from stroking the gooch of either themself or the gooch of another.

They may stroke their own gooch as part of the act of masturbation, but gooch stroking may also be totally non-sexual. Gooch strokers tend to form clans who after intense training in gooch dojos are accetped as a true gooch assasin.

Mandy: Oh Wantabe, let me stroke your gooch while I pleasure you

Wantanabe: hell no, there aint no way I'm letting your fingers anywehere near my gooch, or my bacon strip, you gooch stroker!

by The padre October 19, 2009

15πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž