Provo All Star

A male 18-30 years of age living in or around the city of Provo. Typically a return missionary who spends his post mission life as a D-bag. He will find any way to get around the Mormon church's guidlines on sex while still not actually having sex (Look up Provo push or Provo soak). Will either avoid marriage until his parents threaten stop paying for school or will immediatley marry some dumb 18 year old after he gets off his mission. He will usaully find a job selling security systems making nothing of his life while wasting his parents money at BYU or UVU. If he goes to UVU he will say something like "I chose to go here because of BYU's honor code, not because of open enrollment.". Typically will show up to dance parties shirtless while wearing Ed Hardy sunglasses inside. These men almost always congregate around the arlington, belmont, and alpine apartment complexes looking for sluts. When they park their BMW's that their parents gave them as a coming home present from their mission they generally take up 3 parking spots. Typical conversations with his All Star Bro's will generally include one of three topics: Their workouts, muscles, and how many chicks they have hooked up with. These conversations tend to be as loud as possible and in front of as many girls as possible. A variation of the All Star is the hipster who always wears mocasins and buys literally all of their clothes at the DI (the Mormon version of value village) even though they are not poor.

Gold's Gym member #1: Hey who's that guy taking pictures of himself on his phone while doing curls next to girls in the the zoomba class and wearing a deep v Ed Hardy cut off and Monster hat?

Gold's Gym member #2: Oh dont mind him. Thats just the local Provo All Star. He's looking for an ego feed.

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