Pussy Tongue

A seldom diagnosed medical condition, resulting from administering excessive cunnilingus. A swollen bulb will emerge on the underside of the tongue. This can produce general soreness, and a difficulty eating or speaking.

“Hey why aren’t you eating”?
“It was my girlfriend’s birthday yesterday, and I’ve got third degree pussy tongue”

“Want some Popeyes?”

This phrase is a sacred wild card held by men only to be used in the most dire of situations. These three words will successful defuse a direct vaginal ejaculation situation as well as any attack in reference to such an ejaculation. Tread carefully, if you use this phrase too liberally the female will catch on and destroy you.

F: Holy shit John did you just cum in me?
John: uh
F: Did you? *increasing anger*
John: “Want some Popeyes?”
F: yea can you pick it up

Anti-Vote Theory

An alternative form of voting in which instead of showing your support for something, you instead vote against something you dislike. Traditionally to balance the system, you also add a clause where you may anti-vote as many times as you wish in order to get an accurate representation of how much people hate things. This form of voting is beneficial as it plays in to the much more natural human instinct of hating things instead of finding ways to like them.

1: hey who are you gonna vote for in the next election
2: I hate all of them, I wish I could just anti-vote the ones I hate the most
1: You’re talking about the Anti-Vote Theory dude
2: That’s sick