Brennan

A high school teacher, usually an English teacher, who has been teaching children that are smarter than she is for so long that she now hates kids entirely and is completely jaded with the educational system.

Usually wears an awkward mix of ugly solid colored sweaters with dress pants, and suffers horribly from the "muffin top effect". Researchers, after studying this phenomenon extensively, have dubbed it as the "Brennan mushroom top effect", due to the extreme nature of the situation.

If your teacher is discovered to be a Brennan, switch classes immediately, or commit suicide. Teaching style usually involves 10-12 activities in a class that are never completed, a never-ending grammar practice, and reading stories that the Brennan itself cannot understand. This is coupled with random F's on any and all assignments, and students who pass a Brennan's class are proven to be better at Chinese than English(at least, students who have never studied Chinese are. Students with prior Chinese knowledge are found to forget that as well).

All attempts to fight a Brennan have been met with failure. It is speculated that only a pizzly bear, Bear Grylls, Beowulf, or Barack Obama Himself could fight one off succesfully. However, due to the rarity of these mythical creatures, this hypothesis has never been tested.

"Dude, why is our English teacher such a bitch?"

"Because she's a Brennan, duh"

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bear grillz

Not to be confused with the British Avatar of God Himself, bear grillz are the recent phenomenon whereupon bears have taken to attaching sharp pieces of metal to their teeth.

Thought to have begun because of 'ghetto culture', bear grillz have had the unintended side effect of increasing the deadliness of bears by approximately 4 to the Chuck Norris power. Obviously, this means bears wearing grillz are to be avoided at all costs. The only known deterrents to a ghetto bear are welfare checks and an educational system that can pull them out of their crappy life situations, and hopefully lead them to a better life, perhaps in the suburbs.

An interesting side effect of bear grillz, and ghetto bears in general, is the rise of 'wizzly bears', or polar bears that try to act like grizzly or brown bears. They are usually mocked and derided by the ghetto bear community, but occasionally a wizzly bear will actually show talent in the rap or human eating area and make it big, like Eminem.

"Dude, what the hell is in that bear's mouth?"

"RUN MAN RUN! THAT BEAR IS WEARING BEAR GRILLZ!"

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