Tito Ortiz

A Mexican-American Mixed Martial Artist, once feared by many 10 years ago, but now he is a joke. He is ridiculed for his unusually large head (he looks like a thumb with a face painted on), speech impediment that results in him stumbling over is own words as a result of trying to speak numerous sentences in one breath and the fact that he's married to a syphilitic ex-porn star Jenna Jameson.

Claims to be "The People's Champion", yet no body gives a shit about him, and usually laugh insanely hard when he makes excuses for losing, which has become his trademark. Perhaps his most memorable excuse was that he "had a cracked skull" despite hyping that he had never felt so fit and healthy in his entire life.

Tito Ortiz is a terrible human being; he's depriving useful people of much needed oxygen and may possibly be a closet homosexual. He has a tendency to claim other men are his "bitches" but it's unsure if there is a gimp mask or a rubber ball-gag involved. There probably is.

In the midst of his downward spiral from MMA superstar to joke, he was scheduled to fight his employer, walking mouth, Dana White. Ortiz backed out 2 days before the fight when he realised he'd suffer yet ANOTHER humiliating lose, to a fight promoter instead of professional fighter this time. He also feared he'd be beaten to death because of Dana White's intense hatred of him.

Also, Tito had a few turd-like qualities.

1) Dana White: Tito Ortiz is MY bitch.

Tito Ortiz: Yes sir, please don't hit me, sir.

2) Dana White: I took a wicked dump this morning, it looked like Tito Ortiz.

Lorenzo Fertitta: I hope you flushed, buddy.

Dana White: I did, and just like the real Tito Ortiz, the piece of shit just wouldn't go away.

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