Ian Beale

The second part of a rhyming couplet, usually begun with an innocuous statement ending with a word that rhymes with Beale, and finished by another party. If deemed acceptable by other individuals in a social situation, the recipient must buy the finisher a drink. NOTE: Only words that rhyme exactly with Beale are accepted. Words like deals, wheels, shield or any variant that doesn't rhyme with Beale result in mockery & derision.

Mike: "Went out with the family on saturday night."
Tod: "Oh yeah, anywhere nice?"
Mike: "Nah, just out for a meal."
Tod: "Ian Beale!"
Mike: "Bastard!"

20👍 42👎

Trying To Get The Sky Pregnant

Verb; For a gentleman, engaging in a vigorous act of self-love.

Bob: "Girlfriend round tonight mate?"

Trevor: "Nah, bruv...she's up on blocks. I think I'll be Trying To Get The Sky Pregnant for the next few days."

Bob: "Tough break, mate...I know how you feel."

Trevor: "Ian Beale!"

Both: "'Eeeeey!"

Aberystwyth

The measurement of a Swedish Eurovision-winning band's hand joints.

"We were fitting the band for new shirts, but they didn't fit properly on the arms because we didn't know the Aberystwyth."

27👍 42👎

Toblerone Gauntlet

The outcome of giving a sexual partner too vigorous an anal fisting, resulting in a hand covered in unpleasant fecal matter that resembles a melted Toblerone over ones' fist & lower arm.

Bill: "Went a bit mad on the fisting last night..."
Ben: "Really? What happened?"
Bill: "Went in too deep, ended up wearing the Toblerone Gauntlet."
Ben: "Dude, that's sick!"
Bill: "Yeah. That's what your mom said."

5👍 4👎