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A set of items which can be used in any fix-it applications. An Italian tool kit consists of a paint scraper, which can be used as an ice scraper, a chisel, a screw driver, a griddle cleaner, a BBQ scraper, a pry bar, a box cutter, a fly swatter. There is also a hammer which can be used like a hammer, but not usually. A hammer is used when a screwdriver is not handy or is too time-consuming. The claw end of the hammer can be used to open bottles. A wire coat hanger: This can be used to stir paint, open a locked car door, replace the car's radio antenna, clean a clogged drain, clean the vent on a clothes dryer. Electrical tape: much more precise than that old Redneck Duct tape, which BTW loses it's sticky. Electrical tape will be around for decades longer than duct tape.
"Yo, Benny! Go in the Italian tool kit and get the paint scraper, I need to open the window; I forgot my keys on the kitchen counter!
A pomegranate. Lovely red leathery-skinned fruit, with little bitty corn-shaped berry type seeds inside. The seeds are the edible part.
Me: "Let's go to the store and get a Chinese apple to eat."
Friend: "Don't you mean a 'pomegranate'?"
Me: "Well, we called them Chinese apples when I was little."
A convenience store and/or gas station owned by anyone of Middle Eastern or Indian ethnicity.
I'll be right back, I've got to run down to the Haji Mart and get some chips and soda and fill up the car.
That warp in the space-time continuum that happens when you get on the computer "for a few minutes" to check your email and the next time you look at the clock, it's 4 hours later. Similar to what happened to people in the movie "Looker".
Also akin to the NFL minute.
Man: "Honey, I'll be up for dinner in a few minutes, I've got to check my email."
Woman: "You said that last night. By the time you check your email, read the headlines, check your stocks, play Zuma, look for car parts on eBay, watch a few YouTube videos and download music to your iPod, it'll be midnight! A few minutes in 'computer time' is like a few years in dog years!"
Man: "True dhat!"
Forget about it. It ain't gonna happen. I think not. No way, Jose. The answer is...no. Not likely.
"If he thinks I'm paying this bill when it was his fault the car died, he's got another thing coming. Fugheddaboudit!
A condition of being dirty, nasty, filthy and unsanitary.
I need to go home to use the restroom, that ladies' room at the Wal-Mart was functified. It should be condemned by the board of health.
Opposite of Bucket List, which is the things you want to do before you die, a Fuckit List is a list of things you don't want to do and in fact, would rather die than do. The jobs are usually tedious, boring, redundant and pointless.
Fuckit List:
1. Clean the garage.
2. Clean the gutters.
3. Install new toilet.
4. Strip and wax basement floor.
5. Remove poison ivy from back wall of garage.
6. Scrub garbage can.
Wife: "Honey, did you remember to reseal the driveway?"
Husband, watching ball game on TV: "I'll get to it.."
Friend: "Is that on your 'Honey-Do List'?"
Husband: "No, it's on my Fuckit List...it ain't gettin' done in this lifetime!"