eucalyptass

Extreme redness, irritation, rawness in the anal region and surrounding skin resulting from inadvertent use of eucalyptus-soaked hand freshening towels in place of Dude Wipes (or other type of moist towelette) to clean one's ass after a messy bowel movement.

Man, my grundle is in agony--I couldn't wipe my ass fast enough after laying down some hot snakes, but I grabbed the wrong wipes in my girlfriend's bathroom and now I've got a bad case of eucalyptass.

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ESADA

A more emphatic variant of ESAD, directly addressing the person being scorned. “Eat shit and die, asshole!”

Hillary: You’re deplorable.

Me: ESADA

Glurg

The amount of half-and-half necessary to turn a cup of black coffee into a wonderfully rich walnut color. Akin to a dollop.

Peter: I'm going to Starbucks, Scott. Do you want me to get you anything?

Scott: Thanks, Peter. I'd love a grande coffee.

Peter: Anything in it?

Scott: A glurg of half-and-half, please.

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