Baritone

The baritone is the best instrument of all time. It has a total of 3 or 4 buttons, sounds a little like a trombone, made of brass, and it has a really big range of notes it can play. The baritone is overall just the best instrument that's been created and will ever be created; This isn't up for debate. It IS the best.

Person 1: "I play the baritone"
Person 2: "The fuck is that"

Person 1: "*explains baritone*"
Person 2: "so like a mini tuba?"
Person 1: "...yeah..."

Trombone

The trombones a stupid instrument that has a big slip and slide you move with your arm. Its not fun. Wouldn't recommend.

Person 1: "I play trombone!"

Person 2: "OMG THEY HIT THE SECOND TOWER"