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An outsized, abnormally gigantic poop taken after a visit to Chicago where all sorts of high-calorie foods were consumed.
During a trip to Chicago, Tim had a cheeseburger platter and chocolate mayonnaise cake at Portillo's; deep-dish pizza at Bartoli’s; and a few hot dogs from street vendors. When he got back home to Connecticut, he sat on the toilet and dropped a gargantuan Chicago Deuce that was so huge it looked like a shipwreck.
dopey Dennis Miller clips on RT America
when Dennis Miller agreed to host nonsense on Putin's mouthpiece Russia Today, he regularly posted clips of his Bimbomercials to gullible rubes.
actively irritated, red legions on donald trump's meat-digits
When Casino Mobster waved to onlookers outside one of his 600 trials, all of Twitter noticed legions on The Former Guy #TFG hands, which gave birth to "Syphilis Hands" trending and lots of grossed out people who instantly needed eye bleach.
What D.C. rioters shouted right after doing a bump of smack
After Skeeter-Enos Pawpucket scored some street corner meth in Adams Morgan, he joined with hillbilly pals and went down to invade our nation's Capitol in an act of Trump Treason. Just before reaching the building, he snorted a line on his hand, and screamed "My face is spicy" and then went to steal Pelosi's laptop.
House Qpublican leader's idea of a smart word
"RNC can censure whomever they please" Kremlin Kevin McCarthy told CNN. "The Democratic policies have detrimated our neighborhoods and also I love Vlad Putin more than my wife"
your neighbor's all-caps alert on NextDoor app
when Carol's phone buzzed with an urgent alert she eye-rolled cuz it was another hysterical post from Carl. "there's our Nervous NextDoor Nancy hearing gunfire again" she welped.
when Press Secretary Jen Psaki runs Peter Doocy through the woodchipper
Pete Doocy—Fixed Noise asshole "correspondent" and press-pool troll—asked Jen Psaki if she considered network's christmas tree burning to be a mark on Biden's record. her Drop a Doocy reply: "have you checked Murdoch's whereabouts? probably an inside job. next question"