Melvins

One of the best bands ever. They've been around for twenty years, and they're going stronger than many of the young upstarts fresh out of the gate. They're currently on Patton's Ipecac Records, the place for music. Quite plainly, they just rip shit.

Buzz "King Buzzo" Osbourne--Guitars/vocals
Dale Crover--Drums
Kevin Rutmanis--bassist

Metallica fan: "St. Anger was such a dissapointment. I want to like it, but I just can't."
Melvins fan: "Check out Pigs of the Roman Empire, the Melvins still know how to make music, unlike Metallicock."

482👍 221👎

Cockheiser

When a large male props one leg up on a chair or table and thrusts his crotch into a teenaged girls face. The man then thrusts in and out of the girls face, making odd clicking noises with his mouth. The noises increase in their volume and frequency. After climaxing, the clicking slowly stops, the man backs off, and then tries to smoke a piece of black board chalk. The whole ordeal takes place in a school, and all parties are fully clothed, just adding to the trauma of the recipient.

Example 1:
Person 1:"Oh my god! Is that a machine gun fire?! What's that clicking?"
Person 2:"No, someone's just getting the Cockheiser."

Example 2:
Person 1:"I feel so...violated. A large sweaty Jewish man just came up, and thrust his crotch into my face while clicking his tongue like a mad man!"
Person 2:"Bitch, you got COCKHEISERED!"

64👍 20👎