cell phone warrior

Person who, typically while driving, calls 911 for someone minding their own business on the side of the road typically asleep. See also cell phone hero.

"Hi did you call 911." "What?! Man I was just asleep." "God damn cell phone warrior!"

Townsend

A person, typically someone older, that loves a sports team that hasn’t been relevant for years but still thinks they are the best team of all time.

God there goes Townsend again with the redwings. He keeps talking about how good they WERE. Ugh. Let’s leave.

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