teabag

The procedure of dipping one’s testicles into one’s mouth in an up and down motion.

Secretly gay Devin stood on top of his best friend Harold, who was asleep. He dipped his balls in and out. His saliva lubricated his testicles and it felt so good. Devin accidentally slipped, and his entire ballsack went in his mouth. He tried getting back up, but it was too hard. Harold then started biting. It hurt like hell, squatting naked with pain spreading throughout his balls.
His cock lay across Harold’s neck and Harold’s cat who slept on Harold’s bed woke up. The cat looked at his cock and started to scratch it. Harold bit harder, making Devin hard. This went on for the entire night. Devin vowed to never teabag again.

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Damn girl,

The start of a really cheesey pick-up line.

*Damn girl,* are you from Tennessee? Well you’re the only ten year old I see!
*Damn girl,* did you fall from heaven? Because you look like your face broke in eighteen places.
*Damn girl,* I just lost my phone number, and my social security details.
*Damn girl,* do you have an oxygen mask? Because I’m FUCKING DYING
*Damn girl,* I’m new here, can you give me directions to the nearest AA meeting?
*Damn girl,* if I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put D, I, C, K, and S together.
*Damn girl,* is it hot in here, or is it just climate change?
*Damn girl,* are you tired? Because I slashed your tires.
*Damn girl,* lucky I have my library card so I can slit your neck!

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