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wiimote

Something you find embedded inside a $8000 plasma TV, after the viewer has purchased a Nintendo Wii.

The wiimote is the next generation of video game violence.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter October 28, 2007

34πŸ‘ 12πŸ‘Ž


textureless odorless radio waves

The part of the electromagnetic spectrum below 300 billion cycles per second, or 300 GHz. Used to send magical messages, sound, and moving pictures to people, even though they are not real because you can't see them or feel them. A great portion of the public still believes in their existence.

Clinton:Why don't you go worship your invisible pink unicorn?
Mordecai:Have you ever seen or felt textureless odorless radio waves? How can you believe in that cult idea?!

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter October 28, 2007

2πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


0.244212963 hertz

1. The purported frequency at which Aztec human sacrifices were occuring in 1487 during the reconsecration of the Great Pyramid of Tenochtitlan. This is a period of 4.09478673 seconds between sacrifices. The number is probably inflated as a propaganda tool to use against their foes.

2. A mythical radio modulation method that uses very low frequency blood waves to send propaganda to Conquistadors.

1. The Aztecs were slitting people's chests and tearing their hearts out in the 0.244212963 hertz range.

2. What Ham mode is faster than 30 seconds per dot Morse code and has an equal signal propagation written in blood? Tune to 0.244212963 hertz (0.000244212963 Mhz Upper Sideband(!))on your rig to hear the answer!

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter September 19, 2007

14πŸ‘ 9πŸ‘Ž


3-bit marriage

A state of being where you can have up to 7 spouses. Used a lot in Arabian countries. 3 bits (2 cubed) can store up to a value of 8, and you have 0 for no spouse, leaving you with 7 wives/husbands.

Yassin the Turk felt the limitations of the 3-bit marriage were too tight and converted to Cycle-Accurate Mormonism so he could have a 15-bit marriage and have a bigger family.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter December 24, 2007

3πŸ‘ 4πŸ‘Ž


AOL tactic

Any form of aggressive advertising that does any of the following actions, almost all of which are legal in the USA but not necessarily morally correct:

1. Use of banner ads with Microsoft Windows windows in them to make one think their computer has a problem.

2. Withholds useful information from you until you click Yes on "Do you want to install and run" so they can spread their malware.

3. Rapid and annoying moving iPods or other shiny things/status sympols that might make a Neanderthal have a four hour erection.

3a. So-called free iPods/Xbox 360s that require you to sell your name and address to loads of advertising cartels and require you to buy many other things you don't want AND require your friends to do the same.

4. Pop up/Pop under ads. Need I say more?

5. Microsoft Windows XP Messenger Service black-on-grey text ads that say your computer will die unless you install a virus on it that kills your PC anyway.

6. AOL Discs--self explanatory.

7. Any advertisement for a cult that would make the Jehovah's Witnesses blush.

8. while (1){ ~linux/home$festival -tts "Head On Apply Directly to the forehead!" }

9. Obvious corporate theft from consumers/double-dipping such as advertisements on DVDs, in movie theaters and on Cable/Dish TV.

10. Ads that make you feel sad in misleading ways, such as one for Ron the indigent atheist terrorist needs you to paypal him $20 so he can bomb a church.

11. Windows Vista which appeals to people who give up their freedom to run emulators and file sharing so they can have shiny pretty cute windows that stack like glass.

AOL tactics keep Geek Squad and Firedog in business.
Spank the Monkey and win -$20 is another AOL tactic.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter October 28, 2007

1πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


14 piece dismemberment

When you take a 3 inch or shorter dagger and saw off the feet of a victim at the ankles, then saw off the lower legs, then the upper legs, then the hands at the wrists, then the lower arms, then the upper arms, then, just before he dies from a lack of blood, you slit his throat and cut off his head. So called because when you get done, there's 14 pieces of the body.

Osiris was a victim of a 14 piece dismemberment.

When King Arthur did a 14 piece dismemberment to Igraine, you could hear the sound of her spurting blood colliding with his shiny silver plate armor, as well as her screams of pain as her flesh was sliced open.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter January 3, 2008

9πŸ‘ 13πŸ‘Ž


hollywood marriage

The amount of time it takes for light in a vacuum to go across a distance equal to the diameter of a quark. About as long as the planck time. If you're really lucky, a hollywood marriage will last a whole month, but as they say on the weight loss commercials, 'results not typical'.

With this hollwood marriage I hope I can at least start to let go of my bride's ring before I get divorced. Bonus points if I can make it out of the church.

I made you waste about 6.28x10^18 hollywood marriages reading this definition.

by Wm. Wallace the Freedom Fighter October 28, 2007

27πŸ‘ 4πŸ‘Ž