gothic chapel

A superfluous house of worship; too small to be a cathedral, too gaudy to be conducive to prayer or meditation. The end product of too much ambition and too little ability.

You got married in a gothic chapel? That explains a lot.

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Izzy

A duplicitous person, especially one who claims to be a heroic figure, but who later proves to be a coward and a hypocrite at the first sign of trouble.

A person who will sell out friends and family to avoid dealing with his or her own personal demons.

From Sp. 'izquierda'; left-handed, sinister.

See also Dwarf Jesus.

Judas? Brutus? Arnold? I'd trust any of them before I'd trust an Izzy.

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Dwarf Jesus

A would-be saviour who is incapable of fixing his own problems, but insists on saving you from yours. Salvation, in this case, involves crucifixion of the focus of Dwarf Jesus' attention, since Dwarf Jesus is too short to crucify himself.

Dwarf Jesus occasionally is correct, but this is a statistical anomaly, and should not be trusted.

Verily did Dwarf Jesus say then, "Father, Father! Why hath thou touchest mine naughty bits?"

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