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When you blast out such a quantity of shit that you literally fill the toilet bowl. Depending on the size of the particular bowl, you may or may not be sitting in your own pile by the end.
Honey, I knew I shouldn't have eaten those three buffets yesterday. I just had a bowl filler and clogged up the bedroom toilet. Now I need to call a plumber to get all that shit down.
The plastic bag that your newspaper is delivered in, usually in times of inclement weather.
Mary saw it was raining outside and exclaimed, "Oh fuck! My newspaper is going to be ruined." However when she retrieved her paper, she noticed that the delievery boy had wrapped it in 2 newspaper condoms, keeping the paper dry and readable!
7👍 1👎
A person who goes to Costco for the purpose of only eating the samples and getting in other people's way with abolutely no intention of buying anything in the store. Person may or may not be pushing an empty cart to further disrupt the flow of traffic through the store.
On Martha's 80th birthday, she decided she would do what she does every other day and be a Costco tourist, as she enjoys nothing more than making her daily pilgrimage to Costco. Today she decided she would only make 30 trips around the store, as she scarfs down each free sample offering on each pass while pushing her empty cart to keep others away and obstruct the flow of traffic down the main aisles.
an elevator from a dog's perspective
I live on the 4th floor and I was taking my dog out for a walk, so we took the elevator down. The dog got in the elevator on my floor and when the door opened we were on the ground floor. The dog thought, "How the fuck did that happen? We were in a magic box!"
11👍 1👎
Sudden unexpected death
Did you hear about the dude that dropped dead while running a marathon? His heart fucking exploded and it was lights out right in the middle of the course! People had to run around the body for over 10 minutes until they tarped the corpse.
25👍 8👎