Beef dripping sandwich

When your mum sits on your face.
It’s lovely.

So after a bit of persuasion, I convinced my mum to give me a beef dripping sandwich last night, and I’ve never cum so hard and so fast in my life.

Snow-topped mountain

First, get yourself some really dry skin on your head… like, really dandruff the fuck out of it. Don’t wash, or wash too much: whatever does it for you.

Next: find a female (sorry, this requires a female).

Next step: go down on her.
What you do down there really doesn’t matter. Go ahead and suck, lick, tease; bite if that’s her thing. What’s important is to ensure as much of that old, dead, flaky head skin ALL OVER her mound, thus transforming it into a snow-topped mountain.

Me: Karen, get this…

I didn’t drink for days and I didn’t wash my shampoo out for fucking weeks. I went down on this dirty bint the other day with my psoriasis scalp and fuck me, when I was done, she had the biggest snow-topped mountain I’ve ever made.

Karen: Nice. Nice.

Wow

In a similar way to ‘bruh’, wow can be used as a response to literally anything.

“My mom died yesterday”
“Wow…that’s awful, sorry.”

“My mom won a million on the lottery!”
“WOW! Fuckin’ WOW!”

“My mom made us dinner.”
“Wow. Nice.”