Conquest Hoe

When you play the game of thrones you live or you die. This is true for all unless they have a good conquest hoe. A conquest hoe will kill every mythical forest creature you ask just for sexual favors in return. A conquest hoe also has a master’s degree in discord use so make sure you’re nice to your conquest hoe or you will be forever doomed.

Joe: “there’s bears everywhere, so annoying.”
Jim: “my conquest hoe took care of that for me, and we had sex.”

Joe: “is your conquest hoe also named Jim?”

Rallyback girls

Every winning team needs their rallyback girls. Rallyback girls are so much better than cheerleaders because all cheerleaders do is say go team. Rallyback girls tend to destroy everything from the other team while screaming “she ain’t no rally back girl” and “this my shit” as they flick off the opposing team. The only response to rallyback girls is with more rallyback girls, but that is a bad sign from the gods, like a bad omen or something. Smart people run away when the rallyback girls show up because they can’t deal with their shit.

Wildperson: “I found a new house but it was burned down.”

Kradger: “what happened?”
Wildperson: “the rallyback girls flicked me off, then said this my shit and burned it down”
Kradger: “this my shit”

Trafires

There’s fires, camp fires and Trafires. Trafires wears dominating pants of power and sets fires with her words. Nobody is safe unless she has fresh wine in her cups served by half-obedient manservants dressed in togas. She prefers them to not be eunuchs.

Somebody get trafires some wine before we meet our doom.

Turtlehank

Hard headed and sometimes mean, you want turtlehank on your team. He has a talent for getting banned from chats and setting things in fire, but is even better at trolling.

Death player: I thought I was safe until hank showed up, then I was turtlehanked.

Negan: oh man that sucks, I’ll put in a 3 day bubble.

Veler

A verb. To veler someone is to lovingly destroy. Some would say it is when someone wakes from a deep slumber with a fiery soul, ready to make enemies forget that denny’s grand slam used to cost only $1.99 as their pants are pulled down to expose dirty underpants.

Stan: “was that guy crying?”

John: “yeah he was velered this morning”

Stan: “veler is a badass.”

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Honey Badger

A Honey Badger is not one of the legendary creatures of the forest. Not like bears. Bears are way cooler than honey badgers and are not only legends, but bears are forest prodigies as well. Honey Badgers hide from farmers while searching for carrots because Winnie the Pooh ate all the honey.

Joe: “did you see that honey badger?”

Negan: “nah, I haven’t left this tent in 2 weeks.”

Deceived Smile

When your boy looks at you with a smile that seems to be a happy and warm smile, but you later learn he is plotting to raid your cabinets and steal your cookies.

He smiled as I left for work, but I came home and 21 packs of Oreos were gone. It was a deceived smile.