Chav

A lower form of primate that takes pleasure in terrorising older and younger people when in large groups. Often found in McDonalds, loitering near shops (with no hope whatsoever of being able to buy anything, having spent all their money on cheap jewellery) or destroying local children's parks. Luckily for the rest of the population chavs insist on smoking, eating regularly from McDonalds, carrying around loaded firearms (yes, they are that stupid) in their pockets, and taking drugs; lowering their life expectancy dramatically. It's just a damn shame that they can breed so quickly (possibly a defense mechanism against their short life-expectancy). A chav of 13 is likely to be already supporting 3 thildren via different fathers, all of whom have cleared off long since. Hence the chavette will buy a bumper-sized buggy, wielding it with such agility that she is able to use it as a battering ram in the rush to the '90% off' sale at adidas.
You can find a chav (or rather, a group of them) in every town that contains a pub and a few council houses.

You can find a chav (or rather, a group of them) in every town that contains a pub and a few council houses.

21👍 7👎

emo

Okay, so there are two very different definitions for the label 'emo'.

First version (usually used by non-emos): Emos are attention seekers who live regular lives like every other teenager in Britain but cannot handle the strain as well as everyone else. They say that they are individuals, yet listen to ‘emo music’, hang out in ‘emo groups’ and buy ‘emo clothes’ with their pocket money. They hang out in dark rooms generally ignoring the happy things in life and talk about how depressed they are all the time. Most lie about cutting themselves in order for people to feel sorry for them without actually experiencing any pain at all. Others do it as an ‘initiation’ ceremony in order to become fully emo. ‘Cutting’ is a fad – what on earth does it help? You feel sad, so you cut yourself to make you feel… better? They don’t appreciate what they have, and do not realise how bad other peoples' lives are in comparison to their own. Emo is just an ever-increasingly popular ‘group’ which people want to be part of. It is a group for kids without an identity, looking for a bit of melodrama and ‘deeper levels of understanding’. To be honest, the kids who REALLY have a life not worth living aren’t even in the emo club – they just try to get through each day until it gets better.

Second version (usually used by TRUE emos – i.e. those who actually have a reason to be depressed): Kids who have had the misfortune to go through circumstances which are incredibly depressing. For example, parental divorce, death of a loved one, and loneliness. They listen to music which explains how they feel, enjoy hanging around with people who understand how they feel, and buy clothes that express to the world about how they feel. Only some kids cut themselves. Cutting can become addictive, and it distracts from the inner pain. It can be hard when youre labelled in the street because of what you wear, and can sometimes make depression worse. Being a ‘half-emo’ can also mean that you just like black and emo clothes and haircuts, and enjoy gigs and mosh pits. Some people that you like because theyre genuinely nice people, could be emo, and fun to hang around with.

Nearly every single teenager has wanted some form of attention or feeling of belonging at some time or other, and being emo could be the solution to some. Don’t hate people because of what they are labelled. Get to know them – they may be more like you than you think.

Person: 'Hey dude, look over there, some damn emos with their black hoodies and weird hair... jeez man theyre such attention seekers'
Friend: 'Err... you own a black hoodie, and all they've done is grown their hair long, man.'
Person:'Umm... oh be quiet, fool'

Cheerleader:'Oh my god, that girl is like, SOO weird - she is like, always DEPRESSED and shit!'
Friend:'Weren't you crying on the phone to me the other night because your boyfriend dumped you? You seemed pretty depressed then...'
Cheerleader:'Oh shuttup'

9👍 14👎

Emo

Okay, so there are two very different definitions for the label 'emo'.

First version (usually used by non-emos): Emos are attention seekers who live regular lives like every other teenager in Britain but cannot handle the strain as well as everyone else. They say that they are individuals, yet listen to ‘emo music’, hang out in ‘emo groups’ and buy ‘emo clothes’ with their pocket money. They hang out in dark rooms generally ignoring the happy things in life and talk about how depressed they are all the time. Most lie about cutting themselves in order for people to feel sorry for them without actually experiencing any pain at all. Others do it as an ‘initiation’ ceremony in order to become fully emo. ‘Cutting’ is a fad – what on earth does it help? You feel sad, so you cut yourself to make you feel… better? They don’t appreciate what they have, and do not realise how bad other peoples' lives are in comparison to their own. Emo is just an ever-increasingly popular ‘group’ which people want to be part of. It is a group for kids without an identity, looking for a bit of melodrama and ‘deeper levels of understanding’. To be honest, the kids who REALLY have a life not worth living aren’t even in the emo club – they just try to get through each day until it gets better.

Second version (usually used by TRUE emos – i.e. those who actually have a reason to be depressed): Kids who have had the misfortune to go through circumstances which are incredibly depressing. For example, parental divorce, death of a loved one, and loneliness. They listen to music which explains how they feel, enjoy hanging around with people who understand how they feel, and buy clothes that express to the world about how they feel. Only some kids cut themselves. Cutting can become addictive, and it distracts from the inner pain. It can be hard when youre labelled in the street because of what you wear, and can sometimes make depression worse. Being a ‘half-emo’ can also mean that you just like black and emo clothes and haircuts, and enjoy gigs and mosh pits. Some people that you like because theyre genuinely nice people, could be emo, and fun to hang around with.

Nearly every single teenager has wanted some form of attention or feeling of belonging at some time or other, and being emo could be the solution to some. Don’t hate people because of what they are labelled. Get to know them – they may be more like you than you think.

Person: 'Hey dude, look over there, some damn emos with their black hoodies and weird hair... jeez man theyre such attention seekers'
Friend: 'Err... you own a black hoodie, and all they've done is grown their hair long, man.'
Person:'Umm... oh be quiet, fool'

Cheerleader:'Oh my god, that girl is like, SOO weird - she is like, always DEPRESSED and shit!'
Friend:'Weren't you crying on the phone to me the other night because your boyfriend dumped you? You seemed pretty depressed then...'
Cheerleader:'Oh shuttup'

7👍 11👎