black penis length

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A topic about which there has been a lot of misinformation, myth, fear, and nervous joking.

Many people have it that the "average" penis length of an adult African-American is close to eight inches or more.

Actually, statistics gathered in the USA indicate that on average black men were indeed longer than whites and Hispanics in that area -- but only by about one-third of an inch. Black men have the longest penises, and the shortest. For American men (all races), the average length is about 5 and two-thirds inches, for black men about five and three-quarter inches. The reason the measure of black men did not "swell" the average by a full third-of an-inch is that African-American adult men, as a statistical minority, had fewer men measured as a group than whites and Hispanics, and thus were underweighted in dragging up the average.

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So if you're concerned about black penis length -- don't be.

And don't be upset if your would-be Mandingo turns out to be an Average Joe -- he is more likely that than not.

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cummed

Means achieved orgasm, reached orgasm, climaxed sexually. To use "came" or "cummed" for an orgasm in the past tense? People actually get into arguments about this.

1. One argument is that since "cum" is pronounced same as "come" it's only natural to use the past tense of "came".

2. OTOH: A sportscaster would not say, "The batter flew out to left field." If the batter hit a pop fly, the sportscaster would say, "The batter flied out to left field." "Flew" in this case is absurd (except for a Red Bull commercial!). So by analogy "cummed" is acceptable.

In this writer's opinion, either "came" or "cummed" is acceptable. If you want an alternative that doesn't sound like a sexologist uttered it, there's always climax/climaxed. "I just orgasm'ed" is possible, too, if a bit stilted.

This is truly a case that argues for liberality of usage among even the most conservative speakers of American English. You do yourself and the language harm to over-scruple, and your sex life might suffer, too!

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"I came four times last week by beating off." --

"Oh dang, I think I just came." "You mean you don't know?"

"You cummed in my mouth. You said you wouldn't." --

"Oh shit, I just cummed early." "Don't worry, big fella, you'll live to come again."

(The tag section has other possibilities.)

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fappal tunnel syndrome

From FAP + carPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME.

Getting a strained wrist from working a computer mouse with one hand (e.g., to download porn), and jacking self off with the other. It's generally the lower of the two wrists that develops the syndrome first.

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"Jed says his right (left) wrist hurts."

"Probably poor ergonomic design at his workstation. He's wanked himself into a case of Fappal Tunnel Syndrome. Someone get a crowbar and pry him off that computer. Sheesh!"

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pun

A play on words. Generally a pun takes a word that is quite understandable in context and replaces it with a homonym (same-sounding word) to create an entirely new meaning, or replaces a word with a similar-sounding one to the same effect.

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A pun involving a word with two possible meanings --

Nurse, to young woman about to receive a vaccination:

"You're going to feel a little prick."

Woman: "It wouldn't be the first time."

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A pun that uses a similar-sounding term to the expected one, to humorous effect --

A one-liner: "JFK's private life was so sexy they should have called his administration Cum-A-Lot."

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looky-loo

1. People who go out in public just to see an event that doesn't really concern them -- such as rushing to the site of a fire, or collecting home-improvement ideas for their own house while mooching a free open-house tour.

2. The guy whose goal is to sneak a peek at your dick when you're at the urinal -- or tries to.

3. Ellen DeGeneres' nickname for the "Telestrator" -- the device that allows a sportscaster or other user to digitally "mark" a c.g.i.'ed stripe or streak on a saved visual image, such as a football play seen from above. Any digital image can be embellished with anything schematic that a whiteboard and dry markers would show: combined with X's and O's to show standard football play configurations, for example. Ellen likes to use hers to post-mortem social interactions, such as a guest on her show who was heading in for a handshake but suddenly diverged to steal a kiss on the cheek.

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1. "Retail sales are so far off that on an average day, the mall has ten times more looky-loos than real shoppers."

2. "See the man in the gray windbreaker? He's a menace, King (or is it 'Queen'?) of the men's room looky-loos."

3. "The sportscaster used the looky-loo (Telestrator) to superimpose his own diagram of the play on a video freeze, and to indicate how it failed (succeeded)."
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economic moat

"Economic moat" is a term coined by investor Warren Buffet. It means how susceptible a company is to competition by other companies. Coca-Cola and Phillip Morris (Marlboro cigarettes) are companies with wide economic moats because of the popularity and consumer loyalty of their marquee brands. Boeing has a narrow but deep economic moat because its 777 and 787 aircraft are not subject to immediate displacement, but companies like Airbus and Bombardier could play catch-up over the course of several years by developing similar models that would threaten their primacy. That would close the moat.

-- "Give me an example of a company with a wide economic moat."

-- "The local water company, because no competitor can rush right in with a distribution system (pipes)."

-- "Besides, who else is gonna fill that moat? lol."

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Arpad Miklos

Hunky, Hungarian-born gay actor and model, and quintessential "muscle bear". Miklos lives in New York City but appears in erotic vids filmed on either coast.

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"Who was that great-looking guy with the wide smile?"

"That was Arpad Miklos who, as usual, played the top."

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