The Smith Zhou Diet

A diet that involves putting on weight, but at a lower rate than if they didn’t follow the diet and ate whatever they liked. Followers of the Smith Zhou diet eat whatever they like but make each meal slightly healthier than it could be. For example French fries without ketchup, cake without icing, or 23 donuts instead of 24. When followers of the diet put on weight they have excuses such as water retention or faulty scales. This diet requires little discipline and can be followed by anyone who is delusional enough to think it might work.

I’m on the Smith Zhou diet and I’ve not lost any weight, I don’t understand! It must be water retention.