Shiz

The safe, clean alternative to the swear word 'shit' of which you can use in all situations.
Much like using the word 'fudge' in substitution for 'fuck', it can be used in substitution for any meaning of the word 'shit'.

*nearly drops croissant* "Shiz!!!"
"I feel shiz"
"I can't be bothered with all this shiz"
"the dog shiz"