dunmore

A small town in northeastern PA that borders Scranton. Dunmore is nicer than Scranton, but that is not saying much. It is relatively safe and nothing exciting ever happens here except for the occasional "I saw the Virgin Mary in a pizza box" hoopla which gets all the old birds fired up. Young bucks are faced with the depressing fact that there is very little opportunity and diversity in this area. However, most things here are relatively inexpensive. There are some good places to eat and lots of bars and churches. Drinking is a sport for most of the citizens of Dunmore, who like to get fired up on cheap Lite-Beer and act ridiculous. Most of the people in this area are of Irish or Italian descent, and the overall lack of intelligence among the population leads some people to believe that there has been inbreeding to some degree.

What you will find in Dunmore:
bad attitudes, cheap beer, stale cigarettes, brats, gossipy old ladies, unbelievably moronic human males, unqualified public school teachers, rampant religious zealots, a place where everybody knows your name, unpaved roads, several cemeteries, (cold) pizza, (bad) wings, (good) hoagies, a huge fucking tank situated on a main street as some sort of a nod to the military, and hundreds of mutants, wanderers, and freaks.

Drunk Guy #1 - "How do ya like your hamburgs?"
Drunk Guy #2 - "Dunmore! Dunmore!"

:::Drunk Guys hug each other and fall down:::

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