Bar Ear

1. Synonym for the cocktail party effect, wherein you cannot hear someone speaking audibly, because it is hard to focus on one voice when surrounded by other conversations.

Could you speak up? I have bar ear!

Ummmmm

Ummmmm is a faggoty leftist interjection expressing sarcasm, objection, or doubt. Generally paired with sweaty sic, and some form of homosexual sexual harassment, conducted with total confidence and impunity.

"Ummmmm right sweaty, why would Democrats need to steal an election after 10 months of burning down cities and making friends with everybody? I bet you have a tiny cock, little incel. I bet you love sucking cocks." Said the faggoty leftist, right in front of the HR director.

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Fetish Six

n. Someone who'd otherwise be a four (of ten), but gets a six because they share your weird kinky fetish, i.e. just barely passing for fuck-able, counting all the extra credit.

Mary was a "fetish six," which is to say she'd be totally unfuckable if she didn't share Mark's penchant for Alf cosplay.

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Forespite

1. n. Ability to predict or plan spiteful actions in the future.

Demonstrating great forespite, Betsy planted a sappling in the garden which would one day grow into a mighty tree, which would block her neighbors' view of the sunset.

Playground Honor

1. n. playground honor is a system of ethics involving fair play, and a desire to avoid adult intervention i.e. the nannystate, including:

1) No tattling; 2) standing up for others when necessary, like Batman; 3) keeping one's word; 4) not being a wuss; 5) sharing; 6) not retelling rules like a wet blanket; 7) not implicating others when busted, regardless of the punishment for silence.

Playground honor was hegemonic when parents would beat your ass for shit; and it was considered unfair to subject even enemies to such treatment. However, Playground Honor remains important to allow play regardless of concern for hygiene, physical safety, and "feelings."

"Nobody likes a tattle tale," a common aphorism, central to the ethic of Playground Honor, and indicates the punishment for violating this system of ethics: Playground Honor is enforced by de-facto ostracism of violators, including tattles, whiners, and worry-warts.

Playground honor is supported by caretakers desire not to have to be bothered by punk ass tattle tales. However, some adults also believe that it is necessary to allow the inevitable injustices and dangers of childhood to be solved by children themselves, in order that they develop moral courage and a sense of self-responsibility.

#1 Mike hid from his nanny and held his nose until the bleeding stopped, although he knew his parents would be sympathetic and he hated Alex intensely for punching him; he had a sense of playground honor, and would handle it on his own.

NOTE: Playground honor is not limited to childhood, and may be used describe the moral decision not to intervene or seek out authority to intervene in someone else's problems during young adulthood.

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baldwinize

1. To avoid taking personal responsibility by claiming that your errors were inevitable.

2. To flip the script on others, recasting yourself in the heroic role against the system which caused you to commit harm.

Baldwinizing does not require a legitimate change of opinion (like Morton Downey Jr. on smoking) or even a pretense of changing one's opinion (see Elridge Cleaver).

"We need to create a more robust welfare program to protect the children of single mothers like me from falling into the hood life" baldwinized Mr. Williamson upon his parole hearing, having earned his PhD. in Education and African Studies while serving a 25 year sentence for triple homicide. (He begins his tenure as a professor of Ethics at the Nebraska Coastal University on Tuesday.)

"We have to ban prop guns and switch to rubber guns" baldwinized the sweaty producer, "and I call on you pathetic sinners to fully support legislation to do so."

Commander Autopilot

An extremely sweet kid from Bergen County, NJ who goes to daycare (see defenition). Can be identified by the his sweet part and high voice. Obsessed with Scott Stevens and NJ Devils. Works his ass off in sped classes but still fails and has a combined SAT score of 600.

There goes Commander Autopilot...Wow, how fuckin sweet is he?

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