mermaid nutshot

A circumstance or outcome with a very low probability of taking.

Chad: Just snag a green card and chill w/ me bro.
Abraham: That's a fucking mermaid nutshot, Chad.

pb&j pasta

nutritional unit frankensteined together when there's no snacks left in the fridge

Microwaved, pb&j pasta steaming before her: "I regret my choices."