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Oklahoma Hitchhiker

Unsolicited sexual favors from: a) a hitchhiker; b) anyone occupying the passenger seat of a moving motor vehicle.

I thought Carly and I were just friends; but when the sun set outside of Kansas City she went all Oklahoma Hitchhiker ALL OVER my junk.

by bergbachmetz August 11, 2010


spiced icicle

An ice cube or other frozen treat willfully devoured after being purposefully inserted into both a vagina and an anus (usually on the same female, but by no means limited to such singular flavorings).

Helena had all the best qualities: universally beloved by all who knew her socially, and so freaky in the sack that I finally just ate her spiced icicle, because I WANTED TO.

by bergbachmetz October 20, 2010


pinkquals sign

(noun) the LGBT equal rights solidarity symbol rendered in shades of flesh and blood.

From Willie's burning doobies to silly painted boobies, these pinkquals signs are showing up everywhere.

by bergbachmetz March 30, 2013


floorbergasted

Adjective: a superlative state of stunned disbelief capable of knocking your consciousness to the floor in cognitive defeat before whatever stupendous incongruity you currently face.

I thought I'd heard ALL of my fiancee's family horror stories; but when she told me about her great aunt's retirement plan to be a geriatric call girl, I was floorbergasted.

by bergbachmetz March 25, 2013