Nodependency

Definition: A psychological disorder in which the victims of the disorder are unable to depend on others, having to do everything themselves. Adj., Nodependent; Noun: A Nodependent; Nodependency

My boss, George, has to do every single thing himself, and it appears that he suffers from Nodependency and would benefit from the Nodependency 12-step program.

braggadociopath

A pathological bragger. Noun which hybridizes the Italian word for bragging (braggadocio) with sociopath.

Gawd, all that chick DOES is brag! She's pathological! I think she might be a braggadociopath!

AS

AS = acronym for As Shit

This comedian is funny AS.

doppelgangstuh

Twin souls who love to fuck shit up just for fun, cause that's how they roll.

Beth: Hey, Carol, you up for finding some fancy expensive cars among the one percent and puttin bumper stickers on the back that say, "Cruisin for wenches with all two inches"?

Carol: Hell yeah. If you are, I am. I'm your doppelgangstuh, gurl!

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Trigabuck

(noun) one trillion dollars; (descr. noun) the amount the US government is trying to scam from the US taxpayers--Nigerian-spoof style.

Telephone conversation between Bob and Tom:

Bob: "Hey, Tom, I heard those idiot mortgage dudes scammed their companies and left with their pockets full of gigabucks."

Tom:"Yes, they did. And now the taxpayers are going to bail them out to the tune of 999 gigabucks!"

Bob: "Whew. Could be worse, though. One more gigabuck, and we'd be paying a trigabuck. I'm going to have a beer to celebrate how close we came to THAT."

George Bush, listening in to their conversation by wiretap, on the grounds that they could be Nigerian terrorists trying to scam US taxpayers out of a trillion dollars: "Uh, Bob. About that beer--not so fast, there, dude."

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Bigging the question

In a press conference, when a reporter is called on to ask a question, and instead of asking one question, asks three to five more questions so quickly that the politician on camera can't stop her while remaining polite.

President: Ellen, your question?
Ellen: Yes, Mister President, what do you plan to do about North Korea and do you foresee good news on the economic forefront and what is the status in Afghanistan and are you really considering getting two more dogs and do you think the White Sox will win the pennant this year?
President (still smiling politely): Well, Ellen, I suppose that could be considered bigging the question.

hilariosexual

A person who is sexually attracted to people who make them laugh.

I fall in crazy love with every single person who makes me laugh, so all I can figure is that I must be a hilariosexual.