Hit the # key

Put on noticeable weight. Get fat. (Hit the 'pound' key.}

"Wow look at Lynn. She's a walrus!"
"Yes, after she had her kids she really hit the # key."

14👍 10👎

spank account

The mental "bank account" where you memorize thoughts or images you want to think about later while you masturbate (spank).

Oh my God look at Elizabeth today...she looks so HAWT. Those jeans are definitely going into my spank account.

15👍 3👎

ryetard

(n) A person who is retarded from drinking too much rye.

If you drink too many rye and cokes, you'll become a ryetard.

"Whoa, that girl is totally hammered. She's ryetarded."

19👍 5👎

institutionally gay

A prisoner who has sex with other same-sex prisoners yet claims to be straight.

"Yo man, the guard's not looking. Come here and blow me."
"No way! I'm not gay!"
"I'm not gay either man, I'm just INSTITUTIONALLY gay."
"Oh, so it's OK for me to blow you?"
"Totally!"
"Cool! Mmmmf mfff mmm mfmmmm."

24👍 5👎

Sandbox Caesar

A Sandbox Ceasar is business person, usually in middle management, who was bullied as a child (in the sandbox) and has to make up for it as an adult by being a rude, power-mad, greedy asshole. Will walk over anyone to prove they can't be picked on anymore. They want to be as powerful as Julius Caesar, which is why they act like total douchetards.

"Did you hear Christine going off in that meeting? She was backstabbing everybody to make herself look good."
"Yes, she's a total Sandbox Caesar. I hate her."

25👍 6👎

gramparazzi

A grandparent who takes endless photographs of his grandchildren or boring holidays.

My grandfather is a gramparazzi...he comes over and shows us a thousand photos of his trip to Yosemite. Then he takes a hundred photos of me and my sister.