Baptofascist

(n.) A radical authoritarian ideology fusing (usually Southern) Baptist values with extreme right-wing politics. Baptofascists tend to be the sort of (white) folks who put the Rebel Battleflag on their pick-up truck, use the n-word frequently, and believe in the Rapture. They also mininimize women's role ("Cookin' and cleanin' and servin' their husbands every whim"), are vehemently homo-phobic, and aren't shy about approaching total strangers to ask them if they have yet to accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior. All true Baptofascists are registered Republican, of course. All are pro-second ammendment, against gay marriage, and anti-women's reproductive rights. Baptofascists frequently can be found within earshot of an AM radio spewing Rush Limbaugh's philosophy of hate or The Sean Hannity show. They do not, however, listen to Glenn Beck, because he is a Mormon. Mormons are in league with Satan, silly.

I'm more uncomfortable in these briefs than a Baptofascist at a Gay Pride parade.

63👍 13👎

Zippy the Squirrel

A squirrel that made national headlines in early 2008, after attacking Mike Huckabee during a campaign speech in Clemson, SC. Mr. Huckabee had admitted to consuming squirrels previously, but revenge was not the apparent motive for the assault. The squirrel leapt from the rafters after scurrying amongst the light fixtures, laning on Huckabee's neck and scratching and biting him there and on his face and ears. Huckabee's comments about state's rights and the flying of the Confederate Battle Flag seemed to incite the rodent to attack. Zippy was subsequently subdued by Chuck Norris. Huckabee's wounds were trivial. DNC chair Howard Dean denied that Zippy was a Democratic Party operative, but did say that squirrels are keen survivors, and that Mike Huckabee is one of the biggest nuts out there.

Zippy the Squirrel did his part to derail Mike Huckabee's Presidential campaign in 2008. His present whereabouts are unknown.

33👍 11👎

Getting Mud for the Turtle

To engage in anal intercourse; to insert one's penis into another's rectum.

I accidently walked in on Dad and Aunt Gloria. he had her bent over and was getting mud for the turtle. I may need to seek therapy.

62👍 16👎

Black and Decker Pussy Wrecker

n.) An astoundingly large penis capable of causing trauma if used for regular vaginal intercourse.

I gave Judy the Black and Decker Pussy Wrecker. She hasn't walked right for a week.

80👍 20👎

swallow the swan

To perform felatio. To suck a penis.

Francine knows her way around a dick. That chick can play swallow the swan with me any time.

48👍 11👎

GOE

Abbreviation for a Gathering of Eagles, a right-wing extremist group who thinks that sending off US Military personnel to overseas conflicts to be killed wholesale and lugged home in body bags (frequently burned to a crisp or dismembered) or alive but heinously physically disfigured or maimed or even left emotionally paralyzed by Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, is the best way to support them. This group regularly engages in counter-protests at pro-peace gatherings. Their tactics involve using intimidation, threats, hate-speech, videotaping members of anti-war organizations, and attempting to instigate a violent response through various means of confrontation. GOE members have gone so far as to physically assault grieving members of service members' families who have spoken out against the various wars that the US Government has gotten the nation into. This reprehensible group is opposed by several noble organizations that include Veterans for Peace and the Winter Soldiers. The GOE frequently suggests as "vast liberal conspiracy" involving the media opposes their efforts and calls anyone who opposes their efforts as "moonbats," whatever that is.

Carolyn Swartout is an infamous member of the despicable and often hateful organization known as a Gathering of Eagles (GOE). She has been witness attempting to provoke a violent response at peaceful anti-war gatherings sometimes by using her minor son to instigate a confrontation. She is a coward.

58👍 40👎

banana boob

(n.) a woman's breast that slopes smoothly into its terminus with a pointy nipple. Breasts afflicted with banana boob usually have puffy or atomic nipples. Fondness for tits of this nature is considered to be a fetish. One thing's for sure, they are most definitely highly suckable.

Diane's banana boobs could potentially detach your retina. Be careful!

88👍 33👎