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canada's history

a sexual act generally performed between a man, a woman, and any non-consenting animal. though generally considered a fetish, "canada's history" is gradually entering the mainstream.

using moose antlers, maple syrup and the stanley cup as pleasure enhancers, the act begins when the man dips his cock into the maple syrup. though one might think this will be licked off by the woman, it is in fact going to be used as lubrication for anal penetration.

the woman bends over a table, and the man places the moose antlers on the woman's lower back, just above her hips. the antlers then represent an actual, physical, version of a "tramp stamp."

the man slides his maple syrup ensconced cock into the woman's anus, and the two begin a rhythmic give and take; him thrusting, her receiving. this continues until climax, where the man deposits his cum deep inside her bowels.

after squeezing out every last drop of semen, the man removes his cock and grabs the stanley cup. the woman squats over the stanley cup and shits out the frothy mix of santorum and maple syrup into it.

hockey sucks.

(the animal involved simply watches the two humans in disgust. what, did you think it was involved? pervert.)

"stephen colbert gave sarah palin a healthy canada's history the other day. i heard he needed viagra to get hard, given that she's so fucking unappealing."

by brian q. waterman February 5, 2010

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