Random
Source Code
Random
The spouse, in the sense that she would need to approve a purchase, trip, or activity.
Man, I was going to get that 47-inch Sony flat screen, but Corporate would only sign off on a 32-inch Hitachi.
Sorry, Corporate didn't approve the Vegas weekend. Go on without me.
43👍 30👎
âGooning is a sort of modernized version of tantric sex/masturbation without the spiritual aspects that have been traditionally associated with it in the past. ... Itâs an almost hypnotic, semi-meditative mental state a person can enter after prolonged masturbation.â
The ones who travel furthest for self-pleasure say that, if they edge long enough, they fall into a mind-numbing trance where nothing matters but nutting. Only then can an edger truly claim to be âgooning.â
-- M. Stahl, "THE PSYCHEDELIC SCIENCE OF âGOONINGâ â OR MASTURBATING INTO A TRANCE, Mel Magazine (accessed December 20, 2022)
Just when you think you know how to masturbate, someone finds the goon trance. Now you can spend your whole day almost getting off.
The trope in every action movie by which the villains, often highly trained soldiers, mercenaries, and hitmen launch an arsenal of every weapon known to man, yet can barely nick our hero or heroine with anything more serious than a flesh wound.
Often paired with the Good-Guy Bullseye, which Our Hero/Heroine uses to bring down a spaceship or aircraft carrier with a single, blindfolded shot from a pea-shooter.
Black Widow saved the day because the Russian hit squad had Bad-Guy Aim, allowing her to destroy the Kremlin by throwing a paper plane at it.
Any email thread with more than six addressees will resolve itself without you having to respond.
Wonk A: Incredible! By the time I read that email thread about the TPS reports, Jane in Marketing and Brad in Finance had fixed the problem... I didn't have to do a thing!
Wonk B: Goggin's Law works in mysterious ways, my friend.
8👍 1👎
Putting two spaces after a period. Even though every reference written after 1995 says that it's now one space after a period, your 60-year-old CEO still insists that when he was walking uphill, barefoot, in the snow, with one typewriter under each arm, his secretary put two spaces after a period and, dammit, you will, too, as long as you work here.
My soul dies just a little more every time I put that second space after a period, but the boss says we have to use the Boomer space.
My soul dies just a little more every time I put that second space after a period, but the boss says we have to use the Boomer space.{space}{space}
Delay-sent email.
Your boss works late into the night, but instead of sending you emails at 11:30 pm, she delay-sends them so they arrive at 8 am. You arrive at work with a half-dozen of new tasks that appear just as you're settling to the date. You hate this!
Anson arrives at work, sits in his cubicle, logs on. At 7:59 am, his box is empty and he takes a sip of his coffee. Anson turns away for just a second, but when he turns back a minute later, he finds that 8 new emails just appeared in his mailbox. His manic boss wrote the emails overnight and sent to them to arrive at 8. "Aaagh, 8 Mail!! I hate when does that!!
You checked out or rented an eBook on your e-reader, but you haven't finished as the due date approaches. You disconnect the reader from the internet (airplane mode, for example) so Kindle can't erase the expired book from your reader until you finish: you are Kindlenapping the book.
Damn, I still haven't gotten to the climax of *50 Shades Darker* and I have to work tomorrow. I'll turn off the Wi-Fi so I can Kindlenap it until I have some alone time next weekend.