Carl

Carl is god. He created the universe. He created you. Why support stinky Jesus when you can stan Very Cool and Unique Carl. Elijah Daniel rose Carl from the grave. Everyone say thank you Elijah! Carl is the answer to all your problems. All you gotta do is sacrifice your first born child to Carl and then Carl will always be with you. Praise Carl.

Don’t worry Carl! My first born child is a hettie. I don’t want him anyways.