bum perfume

bum perfume is a luxury perfume made from the chopped off assholes of dead people. different people make different fragrances. old people smell like expired cheese, poor people farts smell like a thrift store, E-girls and only fans models farts smell like disappointed (jk they don't work because girls don't fart). farts from Florida men smell like Cocaine and farts from Saskatchewan people smell like laced cocaine but they are rare due to the population of Saskatchewan (like 7).

it is basically a pocket ass that you carry around with you all day and make it fart on you on demand for that premium smell

person one: do you want your grandfather berried or turned to ashes?
person two: turn him into BUM PERFUME

testicleblimp

testicleblimp is when you get such a good ass blowjob that your dick fills up with air and you pinch your foreskin at the tip so that the air wont escape,( if you want to go the extra mile you can use a string to tie it) this is called a testicleballon but if she(or he) has a nice dose of deepthroating a helium can before she sucks the dick tip it fills with enough helium to make it float.

at this point you have achieved god like powers. you are able to fly on top of the world butt ass naked.

you can have a wank and do jizz trick shots into ur moms mouth

you can piss and shit on your enemies from the cloounds

you can piss on people in the rain and they wont know

you can let the whole world see your asshole

the limits are endless.

person one: did you hear about kevin
person two: yeah i saw his big bare asshole in the air the other day, he said something about testicleblimp
person one: that asshole pissed on my dog
person two: lol
*trickling noises*
aaaaaaaaa shiet