Cole

The tallest man with short man syndrome. Often stemming from attractive parents, particularly the matriarch. Clearly the product of a sexually unsatisfactory relationship, specifically due to the girth of the patriarch's penis (Cole will dispute this fact, but stand firm in your convictions). Very sweet at heart, and the designated music master among his group of peers.

Cole, your mom's really fucking hot– Too bad your dad's penis can't satisfy her.

Cole, could you reach that for me?