abey

One who patently (and pathetically) exaggerates one's accomplishments due to pervasive feelings of insecurity and worthlessness. A pseudo-narcissist if you will...

person 1: I was accepted to every school in the Ivy League, but didn't attend, as I have no need to childishly prove myself to the world. I attend El Generico State University, because it's just as good, if not better!

(**person 2 thinking privately to himself): She's always been a bit of an abey...

person 1: I also won the Nobel Peace Prize for 2006 last month, but chose not to accept it, as I feel it's a completely overrated award. I told them to give it to Muhammad Yunus and Grameen Bank instead.

(**person 2 thinking privately to himself): Riiight...

person 1: Miuccia asked me to walk in her show at Fashion Week, but I declined, as I only strut the runways for Eddie Bauer. Why would anyone want to wear Prada anyway? I told her to use Gemma instead.

(**person 2 thinking privately to himself): Umm... You're 5'3" and shaped like a gourd. How could you be a runway model? And Eddie Bauer doesn't even have a show at Fashion Week. It's not even couture.

person 1: Well, I must be off! President Bush wants me to negotiate a truce between Israel and Hezbollah.

(person 1 actually walks off to her apartment to watch a rerun of "Friends" while scarfing down a pint of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey)

person 2 (out loud to no one in particular): Why do I talk to her?

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