Poser

Is the kind of guy who pretends to be kind and sensitive but really he's controlling and he lies. He may even go to the extreme to start his own meetup group and say it’s for 20 and 30 year olds only…. but he is the kind of guy that really just wants to pick and choose who he likes and lets them into the group because of his extreme control issues. Mostly this kind of poser would include young single girls because he thinks they are not smart enough to identify a poser when they see one. Then he makes up stories to scare young girls into thinking 70 year old men are going to be fondling them and hitting on them in Frederick bars unless he they are part of his group so they run thankfully into his arms out of gratitude.

He is the kind of guy that played the flute in HS, and wanted to be Peter Pan as a child just to wear the tights. His only social outlet is his new group and it makes his cock really hard knowing he can control everything about it. He has no real substance and therefore it's hard to carry on anything but a superficial conversation with him. He clearly was breastfed too long and has deep love/hate issues with his mother.

His ultimate destiny will be to marry a really stupid hot-chick (don't forget looks matter to him) late in his life (but she'll be 25) that likes being controlled but after 8 years and 1 kid she'll resent his control and divorce him leaving him at age 40 and he won't be able to join his own group anymore.

Craig: You know the FNL group has 70 year old that hit on 20 year olds so I started this group to save them.

Random 20 year old girl: Oh Craig you are so wonderful! Let me hug you for saving me!!! Please take me home with you!!!

or

Craig: Mom, I'm so lonely and bored so I started a new group so I could play with peoples lives. It was fun until I took heat for it then I tattled on them to authorities who didn't really give a rat's ass......can I please be breastfed now?

Craig's Mom: Craig, even I know you are a poser. Grow up.

17👍 5👎