battery hunt

A situation where a young lady is out of new batteries for her sex toy(s) and dosen't remember this fact until she begins masterbating. Hence the efuriating, impatient hunt for batteries begins (remotes, old cameras, junk drawer, travel curling iron, garage, radios, flashlights, etc.). If no batteries are found, hunt is then considered a failure and the night is ruined. She might remember to buy batteries next trip to the store but probably not.

If a woman is quickly searching for batteries with you in the store..."Why do you need batteries?"
"Because I need some that's why!!!!"
She's probably on a batter hunt. Get out of her way.

"I had to go on a fucking battery hunt for 20 minutes last night before I finally stole my roommate's remote."

"I hate it when my dad asks me why I need batteries while I'm on the battery hunt. NONE OF DAMN YOUR BUSINESS DAD!"

"What do you need D batteries for? I never buy those"
"I know neither do I but I need them for my vibrator. I'm tired of battery hunting and I haven't filed my nails lately."

2👍 2👎

pussy wedgie

the same as a normal wedgie; except it's when your panties get wedged between your vagina lips instead of between your ass cheeks like a traditional wedgie. Common with thongs and french cut underwear and when grinding in da club.

"Girl, we got to to the bathroom when we get to the next bar. I gotta fix my pussy wedgie"

"After we fucked in the car I dressed in a hurry and had to walk around with a fuckin pussy wedgie for an hour!"

"Goddamn it my professor caught me fixing my pussy wedgie!

46👍 8👎

butt swords

A sharp and direct pain in your anus or butthole that lasts a few seconds and usually causes you to freeze in pain and make a weird face. Females may experience them as a symptom of pms. Anyone may experience them from hemorrhoids...I think. Maybe anal sex? The real cause is unknown. It just fucking hurts.

"Ow! FUCK! SHIT"

"Jesus, what's the matter!? You look like you just sat on a tack!"

"UGH! PAIN! No, ow...it's just my butt swords *sigh*"

"Wtf is a butt sword ruhtard?"

"I don't know what it is...I get a sharp pain in muh butthole, like I sat ona fucking sword or something. It goes away after a few seconds but goddamnit it hurts!"

shoutout to my 43 yr old boss lady who named her ass-pain the same thing i did: butt swords.

9👍 5👎