DOTS

medical slang/jocularity for "Dead on the Spot", corresponds to DOA

Doctor rushes into Emergency, "I heard there was a big bus crash - can I help?"
Nurse: "Only if you brought a mop, there were nothing but DOTS."

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Newfie Flush

in poker a 4-card flush aka busted flush or Chinese flush

Holy shit! My pair held up? What did you have with all that betting?

Newfie flush I was hoping to fill on the river

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deuce

1. in playing cards, a two (eg "deuce of spades")
2. shit (ie #2)
3. a 2-year prison sentence

So I got sentencd to a deuce(3), was dropping a deuce(2), and I was using the time wisely in remarking the deuces(1) in my poker deck

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LAP EGGS

1) testicles
2) a handy mnemonix for remember the 7 Deadly Sins

1) Now that I'm 50, my lap eggs are often under me when I sit -- major ouch!
2)
Lust
Anger
Pride
Envy
Greed
Gluttony
Sloth

fuck, fight, or hold the light

A better way to ask, "fish or cut bait" or "piss or get off the pot"; in other words, to tell someone to be decisive in making a decision.

Literally it probably refers to a situation where you're competing for a woman with another guy.

In other words: "Are you going to fuck her(ie. win), fight him(ie. TRY to win), or hold a light up for his convenience while he fucks her?(ie. be a total loser)"

Sort of a takeoff on the whole "fight or flee" natural evolutionary response.

John: Yo, Ron, it's your turn to bet!
Ron: I'm thinking
Ray: Enough thinking, already! Look - either fuck, fight, or hold the light!

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white shower

like a golden shower but having a bunch of guys cum all over you instead of pissing

Debbie: Ever since I switched from golden showers to white showers, my skin has started to GLOW!
50 guys: unnggghhhh squirt-squirt-squirt

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skull candy

any stylish adornment of one's head (eg headphones, earrings, hairbands, scrunchies, skull spikes, etc.)

skullcandy may be a company that makes outrageously coloured headphones, but who gives them the exclusive right to the term skull candy? I define my beaded headband as skull candy and fuck anyone who says differently!

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