Frack-ass

When you have the high-pressure-hydraulic-shits and you reach down to wipe when a burst of methane unexpectedly shreefs out tearing the toilet paper in your hand.

It took me ten minutes longer than usual in the bathroom because I had to clean up after my frack-ass.

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dicknesia

A straight male's ability to forget the accidental witnessing of his friend's junk, leaving a "scene missing" effect in the chronological progression of his memory.

Jeniffer - I can't believe he just opened the bathroom door on you doing the helicopter dick. Did he see anything?

Paul - Well, in those situations what a man's eyes see and his mind remembers are two different things- it's tramatic dicknesia.