Hanky Spank

When you spank someone so hard they immediately ejaculate all over the ceiling or floor (depending on which way they’re bent over).

Example 1: I spent all day cleaning my ceiling after I hanky spanked Vanessa and Leroy last night. It straight up smelled like salty fish and swamp water.

Example 2: Kimberly enjoyed being hanky spanned so much, their ceiling starting growing black mold from the excessive moisture.

Example 3: “Dude how did you break your wrist?”
“I hanky spanked Kyle on the kitchen floor last night and slipped on his cum making a sandwich at 2am.”

Hanky Wank

When you jerk off or get a hand job that makes you cum hard you scream so loud your bro in the next room cums too from a context orgasm.

Dude, whatever porn you were watching last night caused a straight up Hanky Wank. I’d say get some headphones but that shit was hot.

Bro if you won’t let me watch can you at least be really noisy so I can Hanky Wank along with you?

“Can I have a good old fashioned?”
“Okay honey, but we have to be quiet or our teenager will be Hanky Wanking again…”

Hanky Pank

When you and your bro tag team a married couple and make them scream louder than they make each other scream. Typically culminates in large amounts of sperm covering the married couple who are left quaking on the bed.

Example 1:

“Dude…fist bump…we just hanky panked the shit out of that couple”
“I know, they’ll be cleaning up those loads for a week. Wanna grab some grub? I could go ice cream from the rite aid”

Example 2:
“Dude this couple wants us to hanky pank them tonight, but I’m kind of in the mood for a blow job”
“It’s cool man, it still counts if you cum their faces instead.”

Hanky Wanker

The British version of the Hanky Wank

Blimey! You’re quite the Hanky Wanker with fleshlight, aye chap?

Shall we have a hanky wanker then?
Aye, let’s to it. I’m positively randy presently.