River Gorilla

A drunk, unattractive, usually rather large female found floating down a river relentlessly searching for a mate, free beer, free food, and/or free cigarettes.

First discovered on the Comal River in New Braunfels, TX; River Gorillas have been sighted on rivers all across the US.

Close relative of the Swamp Donkey.

Greg tied a Keystone smothered in pork grease to his fishing pole in hopes of catching himself a River Gorilla.