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Finding yourself out of the vacinity of a toilet and just letting nature take its course and emptying your bowels in your pants.
Might be due to eating a dodgy lamb salad and drinking too much stella the night before and having a bit of a dicky stomach
Michael: So I was on my annual shop to Wilkinsons to pick up toothpaste and new shoe laces as a replacement for a belt for my trousers.
Anyways my stomach was playing up.
I Was walking home and I felt my arse twitch like a rabbits nose.
I went to let out a fart but I felt a warm sensation run down my legs. And I tried to retract it back up my A hole. Unfortunately I had shit stains on the back of my jeans. Tried to ignore it and walk home. Few minutes later, I had the same feeling but this time I didn't even try to hold it in. I just took a SHIT STOP and let the chocolate niagra falls fill my pants. It had seeped in to my shoes and everything. I had Squidgy feet the rest of the way home. I got home and just peeled off my rusty jeans at the bottom of the stairs and jumped in to the bath. It was like a scene from Charlie and the Chocolate factory when Augustus Gloop falls in the chocolate River
An Asian or oriental person, who hangs around the canteen or dining area eagerly awaiting free food or left overs. They may even search through sell by dates on the back of crisps or chocolate in the hope they'll get them cheap or for nothing
Amanda: "does anyone want these monster munch for nothing?????"
Paul: " fucking hell did you see how fast Ray was there?? if there's owt for nowt hes like a chinese raccoon."
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Tho it may look like uncle Bulgaria, the Stella Bin Weasel is the opposite to a womble, it's a giver of rubbish not a taker.
Bearing in mind the weasels bin only gets collected fortnightly, after 2 days of copious Stella intake, the bin weasel finds himself in his usual predicament.
The bin weasels never heard of a bottle bank so instead he does his daily good deed of travelling around his neighbours gardens helpfully filling their bins up with his empty Stella bottles off the day before.
Contrary to popular belief the Stella Bin Weasel is not a malicious or greedy creature.
Rumours of people sighting the Stella Bin Weasel very thirsty and drinking bin juice are misfound and unproven of yet.
The creature is very proud of himself and leads a balanced lifestyle.
In order to support its growing appetite for more Stella artois, the bin weasel will quite happily give up luxuries such as pastries, sausage rolls, cakes and custard creams.
Edward: "Mam he's in our garden again!"
Mam: "Who is son????"
Edward: "Michael from over the road he's just put a carrier bag of green bottles in our wheelie bin again."
Mam: Eddie go to door and tell him to fuck off and chase the Stella Bin weasel
A masterpiece created on the toilet.
where you sit and shit for ages, constantly thinking youv finished wiping your arse.
This is repeated numerous times so that the toilet paper resembles lasagne pasta layers seperating the recycled meat youv give birth to.
Heather: "I thought I was constipated but turns out iv just made a turd lasagne."
Referring to a ladies genital area or vaginal passage being too large or wide that the penis doesn't touch the sides
Michael: "I'm not the biggest but not the smallest either, butbi was doing her and there was just NO FRICTION. So I asked her if I could do her up the back end but she just told me to fuck off!!!
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Referring to someone's stomach hanging out the bottom of there t-shirt, so that it looks like a large greggs stottie they've tried to steal by hiding it up the t-shirt
a north east of England slang word for a fat person wearing clothes far too small that there fat stomach hangs out looking like a large flat bread, they might also be said to baguette breasts
Look at Chris, he's got to be a XXXL. The fat c#*ts wearing a medium, he looks like a stottie smuggler